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 To Spank or Not to Spank

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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Sun Mar 16, 2008 8:21 pm

f--k off Danielle.
i would not smack my kid arouond for no aparent reason or just because i feel like it.
i dont know if i would hit my kid. i NEVER said i would personally do it to my kid, but said i did not see anything wrong with it. many of us i am sure, at one time or another were hit maybe once or twice as a child, and hey! are you scared in any way? im sure your not. Im not saying i would, so cool it.
all you people love ganging up and attacking what i say for kicks i guess or some odd reason.
get a f-cking grip! saying im some hooker slut, i dont even dress that way now, why would i start when i have a child!?
saying i should be smacked around just because i see nothing wrong with giving a child a smack.
Sometimes a child needs a LIGHT smack when they misbehave to get the message across that what they are doing is not acceptable, you people take that as if im gonna lunge at a child with full force!
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Danielle



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Sun Mar 16, 2008 9:53 pm

Ha. You can't even finish a discussion without resorting to swearing, I doubt you could keep yourself from smacking around your child. Yes, I was hit as a child. The only reason it got the point across was because I was so astoniched that my mother could do that to her own child.

Get over yourself. I highly doubt you are a mature responsible person. You are 18 with no future and a deadbeat "fiance" who still lives with his parents. Say what you want, he is a loser for that and for knocking up a teenage girl.
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Erulissė



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Sun Mar 16, 2008 10:25 pm

krystineM wrote:
f--k off Danielle.
i would not smack my kid arouond for no aparent reason or just because i feel like it.
i dont know if i would hit my kid. i NEVER said i would personally do it to my kid, but said i did not see anything wrong with it. many of us i am sure, at one time or another were hit maybe once or twice as a child, and hey! are you scared in any way? im sure your not. Im not saying i would, so cool it.
all you people love ganging up and attacking what i say for kicks i guess or some odd reason.
get a f-cking grip! saying im some hooker slut, i dont even dress that way now, why would i start when i have a child!?
saying i should be smacked around just because i see nothing wrong with giving a child a smack.
Sometimes a child needs a LIGHT smack when they misbehave to get the message across that what they are doing is not acceptable, you people take that as if im gonna lunge at a child with full force!


krystineM wrote:
I am not trashy

lol!

Krystine, hitting is hitting. Justify it however you like, you advocate striking children. Please think twice when your baby is born.
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:26 pm

i never actually said i would hit my child, i said i did not see anything wrong with it.
I dont know if i would hit my child, because i know there are other ways to resolve an issue if my child is misbehaving.
I just said i didnt see anything wrong with it.

Keep throwing jabs Danielle. Say what you want, i have a future. and it may not be the typical one that other 18 year olds have, with drinking clubbing skanking around and more, but this future in my eyes is much better. I will be happily married, have a beautiful son or daughter, and things will be tough here and there but we'll make it. And it wont be a waste of a future, and my fiance is not a dead beat or a loser for getting me pregnant.
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Erulissė



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:33 pm

krystineM wrote:
i never actually said i would hit my child, i said i did not see anything wrong with it.

Why not hit your kid then, if there is nothing wrong with it? Rolling Eyes
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:44 pm

Because, like i just finished saying, i know there are other ways in handling a situation if my child acts up.
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futureshock

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:46 pm

krystineM wrote:


Keep throwing jabs Danielle. Say what you want, i have a future. and it may not be the typical one that other 18 year olds have, with drinking clubbing skanking around and more, but this future in my eyes is much better. I will be happily married, have a beautiful son or daughter, and things will be tough here and there but we'll make it. And it wont be a waste of a future, and my fiance is not a dead beat or a loser for getting me pregnant.

Why will things be tough?
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futureshock

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:50 pm

krystineM wrote:
i never actually said i would hit my child, i said i did not see anything wrong with it.
I dont know if i would hit my child, because i know there are other ways to resolve an issue if my child is misbehaving.
I just said i didnt see anything wrong with it.

This post may have led some to a different conclusion:

krystineM wrote:
futureshock wrote:
In my opinion, spanking is wrong no matter what the circumstances are. I have never, ever hit my DD. Her pediatrician told us his views on spanking, when she was just born and we asked, and he agreed it was NEVER acceptable. Mainly for the reasons others have said, that it only teaches violence. It doesn't help anything. It also teaches your child to be afraid of you.

mm not necessararily, again its what your spanking for, i mean your not going to hit your kid over spilt milk, or dressing themselves backwards because then that can lead to violent behaviour. But when a child has thrown a tempertantrum in the store or is throwing things all over the place, and after more than one try of telling the child to stop, a slight smack on the wrist assures they have your attention and to stop what their doing and listen. And is less likely to throw a fit again after getting a little smack. Again how much force are they using, when is the spank being given, over any little thing, or a matter of stopping the bad behaviour and listening attentively.

I dont see anything bad or wrong about it, unless our punching a child or smacking them with full force.
Toddlers who recieve a slight smack have a pull-up on anyways if they get a smack on the bum, its just to get them to listen and stop misbehaving, and again a light smack on the wrist, i dont see too much violent behaviour or trama due to smacking a child.
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:52 pm

because im a first time parent, he has had a child before so can help out with things too, but regardless its still going to be a little tough or no i should have said stressful on us both.
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Erulissė



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:52 pm

krystineM wrote:
Because, like i just finished saying, i know there are other ways in handling a situation if my child acts up.

Let me make it clearer.

What is your motivation for using alternative methods of correction? If there is nothing wrong with hitting, why do something else?

The answer is not about other methods; it's about why you choose not to hit.
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:55 pm

because i do not feel i would have to hit my child.
i know there are [again] other ways of getting them to listen and stop misbehaving,
its my choice not to hit.
my motivation, being calm about when my child acts up. and getting them to understand what they are doing is wrong and is not acceptable.
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Erulissė



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 3:01 pm

krystineM wrote:
because i do not feel i would have to hit my child.
i know there are [again] other ways of getting them to listen and stop misbehaving,
its my choice not to hit.
my motivation, being calm about when my child acts up. and getting them to understand what they are doing is wrong and is not acceptable.

So hitting isn't so great after all? Is that what you are trying to say?
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 3:10 pm

its not the best way to deal with misbehaviour, but i do not see anything wrong with it.
my niece and nephew are given a little smack once in a while if their acting up and they are perfectly fine.
i see nothing wrong with it but there are other ways of addressing a situation.
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Erulissė



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:23 pm

krystineM wrote:
its not the best way to deal with misbehaviour, but i do not see anything wrong with it.
my niece and nephew are given a little smack once in a while if their acting up and they are perfectly fine.
i see nothing wrong with it but there are other ways of addressing a situation.

(I'm going to keep pressing, please be patient with me.)

Why is it "not the best way to deal with misbehaviour"?
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futureshock

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:27 pm

I think what some of us would like to hear is, "I changed my mind about hitting."
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:37 pm

no i have not changed my mind, i mean many parents give a smack to their child not all the time, but it happens, and i have yet to see permanent damage. other than when i child is abused and has marks of physical abuse it is a problem.
like i have said more than once now.
i know there are other ways of dealing with misbehavious.
i never said i would personally hit my child, just that i see noting wrong with it.
why i would not is because i would explain what their doing is wrong.
its not the best way because you havent explained why what they did was wrong.
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W.S.



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:41 pm

krystineM wrote:
no i have not changed my mind, i mean many parents give a smack to their child not all the time, but it happens, and i have yet to see permanent damage. other than when i child is abused and has marks of physical abuse it is a problem.
like i have said more than once now.
i know there are other ways of dealing with misbehavious.
i never said i would personally hit my child, just that i see noting wrong with it.
why i would not is because i would explain what their doing is wrong.
its not the best way because you havent explained why what they did was wrong.


smack

VERB:
smacked , smack�ing , smacks
VERB:
tr.

To press together and open (the lips) quickly and noisily, as in eating or tasting.
To kiss noisily.
To strike sharply and with a loud noise.

If I ever found you were to smack your child, I would find you and press charges against you. Do not use that term again. It is incredibly offensive. I'm sure you wouldn't wish for someone to SMACK you.
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 4:51 pm

are you serious, when a parent gives their child a SMACK, do you honestly think they use full force! their a quarter of your height and weigh way les than you!!
AND if yo have been reading the last of my responses which you clearly have not and just jumped in to harrass me as usual, you would have read that i would NOT hit my child because i would go about the situation in a different manner instead of resorting to a SMACK.
Press charges against me, if you did do that, cops and social workers would have to see some serious trama and physical abuse to press charges, and since i would not SMACK my child that would never happen.
grow up and read CAREFULLY when i respond to something.
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futureshock

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 5:09 pm

krystineM wrote:
no i have not changed my mind, i mean many parents give a smack to their child not all the time, but it happens, and i have yet to see permanent damage. other than when i child is abused and has marks of physical abuse it is a problem.

Do you think this is the only thing people object to regarding spanking/hitting children?
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W.S.



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 5:35 pm

krystineM wrote:
no i have not changed my mind, i mean many parents give a smack to their child not all the time, but it happens, and i have yet to see permanent damage. other than when i child is abused and has marks of physical abuse it is a problem.
like i have said more than once now.
i know there are other ways of dealing with misbehavious.
i never said i would personally hit my child, just that i see noting wrong with it.
why i would not is because i would explain what their doing is wrong.
its not the best way because you havent explained why what they did was wrong.

Because I'm a parent and have been a parent and know other parents and have done the whole parenting classes and read about two or three dozen books on parenting, let me as you this:

What will you do when your child doesn't listen and has a tantrum in the grocery store? Will you wait for George to be there to deal with this or will you, personally, deal with it?

How hard do you think you need to hit a child before there are marks? What about emotional marks (scars) from being hit?
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Erulissė



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 6:42 pm

krystine wrote:
Press charges against me, if you did do that, cops and social workers would have to see some serious trama and physical abuse to press charges, and since i would not SMACK my child that would never happen.

That is not true. There does not have to be "serious trauma and physical abuse" in order to press charges. You can touch someone in the right situation and that can be classified as assault. If I walked up to you and hit you, you would certainly be well within your rights to call the police and press charges against me.

Krystine wrote:
no i have not changed my mind, i mean many parents give a smack to their child not all the time, but it happens, and i have yet to see permanent damage.

Other than the posts on the first page about what hitting kids does to them...you're just going to ignore that. Suspect

By the way, let's have a semantic reality check. You can call it "spanking" and "smacking" but what it really is is called hitting.
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 8:21 pm

ok well i think it makes them confused.
wondering why they were hit instead of told what they did wrong.
but still when a parent does give a light hit, they usually say 'you do not do that' [whatever they did wrong]
but i dont think i would do that with my child. i would handle the matter differently i have answered your question Erulissė now more than once. that is the answer your getting, i would deal with the situation differently than hitting.

If my child acts up in a grocery store or the mall juryofone i would stop what im doing, leave the store with my child and in the car explain why we left. i dont have to wait for george to be there to explain to our child:
'you were not being a good boy or girl in the store, and did not listen to mommy and that is why we are leaving the store.'
And i do believe i answered this once before.
A child when given a light hit usually has a pull-up on which can not possibly leave a mark.
Emotional scars, yeah it can happen, but like i said many times now, i would not hit my child i would explain why he or she was sent for a time out, why we left the store, or any other way i handle the misbehavious other than spanking.
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W.S.



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 8:44 pm

So what you are saying is there is a timeline you feel giving your child a swat is ok. Such as during the toddler years? Those would be the pull-up years.
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krystineM

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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 8:49 pm

no i just was saying that when a child is given a spank, its light first off and they have a pull-up on so they cant feel any pain or have a mark left on their behind.
and AGAIN i said i would not hit my child. because once again, i would deal with the misbehavious in a different way that hitting.
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W.S.



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PostSubject: Re: To Spank or Not to Spank   Mon Mar 17, 2008 8:56 pm

krystineM wrote:
ok well i think it makes them confused.
wondering why they were hit instead of told what they did wrong.
but still when a parent does give a light hit, they usually say 'you do not do that' [whatever they did wrong]
but i dont think i would do that with my child. i would handle the matter differently i have answered your question Erulissė now more than once. that is the answer your getting, i would deal with the situation differently than hitting.

If my child acts up in a grocery store or the mall juryofone i would stop what im doing, leave the store with my child and in the car explain why we left. i dont have to wait for george to be there to explain to our child:
'you were not being a good boy or girl in the store, and did not listen to mommy and that is why we are leaving the store.'
And i do believe i answered this once before.
A child when given a light hit usually has a pull-up on which can not possibly leave a mark.
Emotional scars, yeah it can happen, but like i said many times now, i would not hit my child i would explain why he or she was sent for a time out, why we left the store, or any other way i handle the misbehavious other than spanking.

You have said the bolded part many times.
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